Thursday, 11 July 2013

Alaskadie and the Seal of Rock and Roll (part 3)



While in Plakias I was introduced by a cute girl named Candy to a nice guy named Chad. Chad is one of those ultra likeable dudes that everyone and their aunty gets on with. The kind of lad that your mum wants to meet because she’s heard just how lovely he is and wants to see “this friend of yours that everyone talks about. Why can’t you be more like him?”

One morning in Smirna I was yet again trying unsuccessfully to get the barmaid Svetlana to play a song of my choice (response each time was something like “NO! You don’t like my music, YOUR problem!”). Smirna is the bar open the latest in Plakias and anyone who doesn’t want to go to bed/ sober up usually makes their way there for a beer or shots of tequila. I was on my own and in a comfortably numb alcoholic buzz until Joe from Nufaro came in after locking up. We had a few shots when Candy and Chad came in and ordered coffee. Bemused I went 
“Coffee? You ill?” to which Candy replied:

“Lance it’s 7am.”

I turned around and it was indeed daylight outside. Ouch!

Candy then referred to Chad as “the angel” and not realising the context I just assumed she wanted to shag him so I had another beer or two and then went home to sleep.

Over the next few days I met other people who called Chad “the angel” and realising his sexual magnetism probably didn’t extend to blokes as well as women I delved a little deeper and found out the following rather splendid story.

While in Rethymno youth hostel about 2 weeks before (a town about 25 miles from Plakias) Chad met up with a group of American guys who were heavily into partying hard. They went out for a meal and some drinks and as the night wore on, Chad remained relatively sober, while the other guys got more and more wasted.

Eventually calling it a night, Chad was at the hostel on his laptop when he realised that the guys were so drunk they wouldn’t be able to get home again as the hostel is a bum ache to find if you’re sober, let alone shitfaced.

Switching off his computer he soldiered out into the depths of Rethymno to find these guys. They weren’t in the bar where he’d left them so he tried several others and eventually found one of them. The guy was steaming, and was so drunk he was falling asleep standing up. The barman had the strange notion of giving him a shot to “wake him up” but Chad talked him out of it and walked the guy back to the hostel instead. After the dude was snugly tucked up in bed, he then went hunting for the bloke’s pals.

Eventually he found another, who was so trousered that he didn’t remember or recognise Chad, but let him escort him back to the hostel. As he had the only key Chad took it once the guy was in his room and then went looking for the final member of the clan. Unable to locate him he ordered some food from a take out place and ate it while wandering around, finally chancing upon the last bloke pissing up a wall near the docks. He then escorted him home and went to bed himself.

He didn’t know these guys.

He’d never met them before that night.

He then moved on to Plakias and a few days later another backpacker arrived in P from Rethymno. Upon meeting Chad he went “OH MY GOD!!! It’s you!!! I’ve heard SO much about you!!! You’re the angel!!!”

Bemused Chad asked him what he meant and…

The American lads had apparently woken up the next day, VERY hung over but with no memory of how they got to bed or even how they got back to the hostel. The only thing they could all remember was seeing Chad’s face at various points throughout the night.

They finally pieced it all together and were eternally grateful, nicknaming him The Angel and telling everyone about him.

When they turned up in Plakias themselves a few days later they were all over him, refusing to let him buy his own drinks and lauding him as a hero who’d saved them from, at the very least, a night in the gutters of Rethymno’s main streets.

After the main group left and only one remained, me and Chad were sitting outside Joe’s bar when a lad named Geoff came out and enquired “Chad, why aren’t you drinking?”

He replied “Just taking a break.”

Geoff then smiled and said “The boys gave me 300 Euros before they left to make sure you’re never without a drink in your hand. Come on.” He then took Chad into the bar and proceeded to get him drunk.


Awesome.




1 comment:

  1. As the only person to ever actually date Chad "The Angel" (seriously, ask him, it is true... I'll wait), I approve this message.

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