Friday, 7 September 2012

21 Reasons Why The New Judge Dredd movie (Dredd 3D) fucking ROCKS!!!

(So fuck off if you don't want the movie ruined before you 've seen it)

  1. He never takes his helmet off as per the comics.

  1. They made it an 18 certificate. So it’s full of sex, violence, profanity and gore.

  1. With the exception of the shoulder pads and ID badge chain, the judges’ uniforms are badass versions of the ones the comic characters wore.

  1. It pisses and shits all over Stallone’s pile of garbage from 1995.

  1. Fanboys rejoice. Judge Anderson gets naked and gives some dude a blowjob.

  1. Anderson is insanely cute and looks like a punk chick in a badass cop uniform.

  1. Dredd is angry, nasty and brutal…as per the comics.

  1. His negotiation tactics when faced with a drug crazed killer pointing a gun at a civilian is to offer “life without parole in an iso-cube…or death.”

  1. When told to freeze by two kids pointing guns at him he slowly turns round and asks in all seriousness “why?”

  1. He shoots the two kids…but with stun shots (although these appear to hurt like hell anyway).

  1. A homeless guy, about to be arrested for vagrancy, is sitting right under the locking slot for Peach Tree block’s blast doors. When the Defcon test is activated, he gets squashed

  1. Never outside The Walking Dead or the Saw franchise have we seen so many skinnings, eye gougings, exploding heads and people being burned alive.

  1. The subtle shout outs to both Robocop and 2000ad comic.

  1. He runs out of bullets so simply throws a bad guy off a balcony….from about 76 floors up.

  1. He shoots people in the back and in the face. He does this because he’s a Judge and can execute criminals as well as simply arrest them.

  1. A Judge’s Lawgiver pistol is linked to an individual Judge’s DNA. So when a baddyy tries to execute Anderson with her own gun, it explodes and takes his hand off. After a few seconds of staring at him in a “how do you feel now you cunt?” kind of way…she then kicks him in the face, breaking his neck.

  1. Dredd is sneaky and cynical and suspects another Judge is bent, just because he doesn’t ask the right questions when arriving as back up.

  1. After kicking this guy’s ass in a fight, he stoves his throat in with the butt of his gun…and walks off leaving him to choke to death.

  1. Anderson is psychic and cold bloodedly shoots another bent Judge…after reading her mind..

  1. When he faces down Lena Headey’s character MaMa at the end, she says she has the detonator to enough bombs to kill everyone in the block…linked to her heartbeat. Dredd simply shoots her and then throws her out the window to test the theory.

  1. Dredd fires a Hotshot (incendiary) round into a guy’s mouth. This cooks his head from the inside out and makes a lot of mess.

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